A Stab in the Dark

Or a bite on the bum. Whatever.

Today’s post is an on-the-run moment of freedom prior to the settling in on the ‘new’ story.  What new story? Oh, you want to know about it? A little bite of the cherry?

Well, the truth is this: it’s not new, but it is newly designed, newly structured, newly patterned. The Valki of Three Salt Springs has been revamped.


Well, it was a bit dull. Okay, it meant something to me, it’s a place and story I loved, but it just didn’t sit well with the collaborating author (Nan’s now gone back to doing the political editorials, just for a bit of fun in her life).

The story isn’t lost. It isn’t over. And the bones are good, but the clothing it was dressed up in was a bit slow, a bit inner. And it’s not what I want from it. I want it all – a deep insight into the main character, a compelling journey with heart-stopping moments, warm moments, scary moments, disgusting moments.

It didn’t have them, not to the full extent. It had starter elements of those things, but not to the full depth.

Nan (aka Rose) gave her blessing to the new structure, the layout, the beginning moments (‘cos that’s all there is at the moment), and she walked away. Will she come back later? Of course, but only after the main work is done. I mean, I should show a little respect for her age, shouldn’t I? (her words, not mine.)

So, the Valki of Three Salt Springs. The blurb is still similar, the story setting remains, the main characters are still there, but now – well now, you see the real deal.

The Valki of Three Salt Springs maybe:  December 2017 Contemp Fantasy/paranormal
(1) An untested Sylph runs away from her fate, and her mistake – straight into the arms of her mortal enemy: a gnaDenaiad harridan.

That’s the old blurb. Here’s the potential new ones (yet to be chosen):

(a)- A young woman tries to run away from her fate, and her mistakes, but even a country town in the neighbourhood of the black stump puts her face to face with her most dangerous foe.
(b)- A grief-stricken young woman finds you can never run far enough when you try to hide from your fate or a broken heart.
(c)- An untrained Valki tries to run from her destiny but ends up living next door to her most fearsome enemy – a gnaDenaiad harridan.
(d)- A runaway Valki takes her broken heart to the outer edges of the black stump, but it’s not far enough – even here, she finds her mortal enemy.
(e)- How far can a broken Valki run, what would it take to get away from the enemy that holds her fate, her life, and her future within its claws?
(f)- When her destiny costs the life of her fiancee, the untrained Valki runs as far and fast as she can – it’s not far enough.

So, which do you prefer? I know they all sound similar, but there are huge differences in how it will be written for each one.

(a) would focus on her youth and mistakes, the angst of inner demons (until she meets the outer demon).

(b) would focus on the grief and how she deals with it (and the off-shoot not yet mentioned – you find out when you read it!).

(c) would focus on the fact of being untrained and in the vicinity of the outer demon who wants her dead.

(d) would focus more on setting, isolation – with the inner demon associated with knowing when to ask for help, etc.

(e) would focus on the element of fate, or destiny, of the Sylph (soon-to-be Valki warrior).

(f) would focus on the distance you travel with grief as your companion – and how it always gets you in the end, unless you deal with it head on.

Tell me, and I’ll take every comment into consideration in the next stage of planning (which begins today, but usually takes a few days before the actual writing begins).




15 thoughts on “A Stab in the Dark

  1. I would never ask for ideas from my readers. For one thing, I wouldn’t listen and for another thing, I’m totally paranoid about anyone reading anything until I feel I’m “ready” for the public. I’m impressed you are comfortable enough to do it!

    Liked by 2 people

    • I like hearing how people/readers ‘feel’ about an idea. I think my history of dozens of foster kids, dozens of siblings, dozens of people who love to have a say, has prepared me for the differences that come from the vision/reading of the same thing. Primary sources taught me that no two people have the same experience, even at the same event.
      I may want a particular ‘feel’ for the story, but if I get a few bits of feedback that all say the same thing, I might (might!) alter tack and see where the wind takes me.
      No promises, except that I will listen, reflect, and then make decisions – based on my best feeling (after all, I’m the one doing the work).
      Ideas are free, but the hard work that goes into the product, that’s different. That’s blood and sweat and hard grind (and I love it – gimme more coffee!).

      Liked by 1 person

    • Are we ever ‘ready’ enough? I take the view that there won’t be too many people looking at it anyway – I’m not a known entity – so why worry? Just take that step and see what happens – there will be solid ground under your feet, or the ground will be slippery, or you fall on your butt. None of those things are likely to do too much damage, so … on we go, one step at a time.


  2. Thanks – grief, the journey it takes her on, and what happens when she doesn’t deal with it. As always, I don’t know how it will end up, but to at least start with an end in mind does help. I’ll look into it.


  3. For me, the blurbs are all too short. I’m not exactly sure why, but I think it might be the introduction of the “unknowns” – Valki, gna-Denaiad, the black stump. I, personally would want more to grab onto. That leads me to B, which isn’t confusing, but it seems a little romancy, and I don’t think that’s what you want. 🙂 In terms of focus… c and f are most interesting to me. Of course, this is just one opinion and without any insight into your story. Good luck and Happy Writing!

    Liked by 1 person

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